Blood Pressure Blog

I’m sad. NFL playoffs are here which means that the one thing that gives me order and structure in my life will be gone again in a mere month. Fortunately, the best is yet to come. The NFL has honestly been under a lot of heat for really bad and frankly soft fan culture during the regular season that makes European soccer look like World War 3, but finally the playoffs should actually give us some exciting single games that don’t require the handicap of the RedZone channel. Read till the end for the Teaser of the Week. Here are my predictions –

(7) Seattle @ (2) San Francisco

People have been really hating on Seattle for no good reason. I know everyone wanted the Lions to make the playoffs, but what Geno did this season in terms of career resurgence might be something to stop writing home about. People already see this as a Niners win, but the method of winning for these 10-point favorites will not be simple, in what will be a wet, windy, run the ball through the center of the Earth type of effort. I still think the Niners win, but my money is on Seattle to cover the spread.

(5) Los Angeles Chargers @ (4) Jacksonville

No disrespect to Titans fans but thank God we don’t have to see Ryan Tannehill hand the ball of 30 times in the playoffs. Jacksonville has now graduated from the ‘Annual Houston Texans Memorial Saturday Afternoon Wild Card Weekend Game’ and now is the proud owner of 2-straight back-to-back home primetime games. In what should be a shootout on paper, funny enough the team that shoots itself in the foot less should win. Unfortunately, both teams are destined for truly head scratching moments, but I see the Chargers pull a win as a road-favorite in a thrilling Saturday Night finish just based on the pure talent and defense. Feel free to tease the spread for the Jags though.

(7) Miami @ (2) Buffalo

Can Skylar Thompson take down Josh Allen in cold road game, no. The Dolphins by no metric are a team built to play in the cold, and those teal-green uniforms are going to look so slow in below freezing temperatures while the Bills thump points on the shaky defense. Bills win and cover in an easy playoff opener for the Superbowl favorites.

(6) New York Giants @ (3) Minnesota

One word – 4pm. As we know at the crack of 4pm, Kirk Cousins turns from the best quarterback in the league into a guy that carries a wad of Kohls cash in his wallet in any game that’s not in the early slate. In a big rematch, the Giants have nothing to lose and revenge to enact as they attempt to make right on the season while getting the little things right in the playoffs. Brian Daboll has seemingly resurrected Daniel Jones’ career and proceeds to put Kevin O’Connell’s brain in a pretzel through pure grit, toughness, and running the ball 25 times a game. Watch the Giants beat one of the most fraudulent teams in the league and become the ultimate underdogs in the playoffs.

(6) Baltimore @ (3) Cincinnati

Ok, I’ve seen this movie before. Baltimore goes to their division rival with a third string QB in Anthony Brown and proceeds to get smashed by an AFC contender. To do the same thing repeatedly and expect the same results is insanity, meaning the Bengals take care of business, as well as cover.

(5) Dallas @ (4) Tampa Bay

There’s no way to say this politely, Mike McCarthy is the worst motivator in the NFL. The storyline coming into this game is predicated on Tom Brady never losing to the Dallas Cowboys. Coupled with Dak Prescott looking like – in the words of Amari Cooper, ‘Black Kirk Cousins’, Dak surely throws like 2 INTs, and Mike Evans burns Trevon Diggs for 3 TDs. Like the Ravens and the Bengals, we’ve seen this movie before, and the track record of the Cowboys in the playoffs is a soul-cruising, mind-numbing, makes anesthesia seem like drinking a glass of water type of shit. Buccaneers seem to be peaking at the right time and take care of business at home. This is the lynchpin that ends Mike McCarthy’s tenure in Dallas and the foretold prophecy of Dallas head coach Sean Payton comes true.

Teaser of the Week – 7 points, pays +450

• Seattle +17
• Jacksonville +9.5
• Buffalo -6.5
• New York Giants +10
• Cincinnati -3 Tampa Bay +9.5