1. 2 Girls 1 Kupp (5-0)
Owner – Satwik Nandala, Vivaan Patel
Last Week – #1
An absolute wagon. No team thus far has found the solution to beat 2 Girls 1 Kupping Szn, and it likely will stay that way. There’s top 10 talent all over this team, at every single position, and if something could be said about a flaw, potentially not a great bench. We’ll see how this team reacts when bye weeks approach, however, having 2 of the best WRs and some of the best RBs in the league seems like a cheat code. This team is a contender for being one of the best drafted teams in the history of the league. Next week will be an interesting matchup against Ramesh and some more high scoring potential.
Award – Top Score of the Week
2. Travis Scott (4-1)
Owner – Ayush Jha
Last Week – #6
This team was completely dead on Thursday night. DK Metcalf and Robert Woods nearly killed Ayush even before a single player played. But, with one of the great comeback stories of this week, Travis Scott found the Antidote after scoring 60 points in week 5, and scoring 90 more points than his previous performance, with the highest total of Week 6. As the only 4-1 team in the league, there’s an extremely comfortable cushion from being eliminated, but with the plethora of 3-2 teams coming at his neck, will bipolar consistency be sustainable for a top-3 finish on the table? This question will likely not be answered next week, as Ramanan’s traveling refugee circus should be enough to make this team 5-1.
Award – Team of the Week
3. DoubleTrey Hotel (3-2)
Owner – Manoaj Kandiakounder
Last Week – #2
Manoaj lost the battle of freshman roommates, but still has the supreme team over his old college dorm-mate. Week 5 called for a good, above average scoring day for this team. We know this team is competent, but some weeks are unlucky. 3-2 is not a terrible place to be, and as one of the more consistent teams in the league, scoring sub-100 points only once in the season, I believe this team still stands as the only chance to beating the current 5-0 team in the league. Week 6 calls for a similar sort of matchup as week 5, as the DoubleTrey Hotel hosts the Noah and his R-rated version of the SpongeBob meme that’s wayyy too difficult to type out.
4. mcKISSic MY bASS (3-2)
Owner – Noah Rickles
Last Week – #7
Hannukah came early in 2021 with absolute Hail Mary Madness as Noah wins the matchup in the last quarter of Monday night football, when Mark Andrews catches 2 TDs and Lamar Jackson throws for 400+ yards for the first time in his career. With joining the large club of 3-2 teams in the league, this is a club trending in the right direction, winning 3 straight, after starting the season 0-2. As do most Noah owned teams, they struggle in the beginning weeks of the season, and hit their stride in the latter stages, so – is it too early to ask if this team is peaking too early? A matchup with Manoaj is on the books for week 6 as an “is this team for real” game, which Noah will look to extend his win streak to 4-games, and a chance to compete for one of the top spots in the league.
5. This Justin: I Love Carolina (3-2)
Owner – Matt Lord
Last Week – #5
Thanos put it best, the Panthers are ‘inevitable’. I predicted a few weeks ago that faith in the Carolina Panthers and an offense led by Sam Darnold may not be a strategy capable of winning the league. Though Sam Darnold no longer sees dead people, MVP candidate Justin Herbert sits on the bench and scores 40+ points? I can’t tell if Matt is just addicted to the Panthers players, or if he’s just taunting hatred for the NFC south? Regardless, the Panthers are a 3-2 team, as is Matt – what a surprise. The two weeks the Panthers lost (against Dallas and Philly) were weeks that this team lost as well. I think the blueprint forward from mediocrity is clear, and Matt may need to face the man in the mirror when facing Chinmay’s kinda-frisky team in week 6.
6. Gay Rights (3-2)
Owner – Arpan Bhavsar
Last Week – #3
“Projections take till week 4 to be accurate” – Arpan Bhavsar. Arpan went from a 140+ point week 4 showing, to a dismal 73 point week 5. For the record, Arpan was 1st in scoring in week 4, and last in scoring in week 5 – a roughly 70 point swing. I get that Chris Carson was out, I get that the Seahawks are now Geno Smith’s/Blake Bortles’ team – the excuses are endless. Probably the single most bipolar team in the league has seesawed in scoring all season. Consistency has not, and will not be found with Arpan’s team moving forward, especially when considering a bench with the shallow equivalent talent pool of a middle school JV team. I see tough times ahead, and it may be time to exercise the free agent budget.
Award – Dumpster Fire of the Week
7. Waddle House (2-3)
Owner – Nikhil Ramesh
Last Week – #10
Amongst the unlucky teams is Ramesh’s team, boasting a 2-3 record, but having the 4th highest cumulative points totals in the league. This team should be at least 3-2 if the schedule fell their way. With only one sub-100 point scoring week, and several 110+ point losses, I think the tide of luck should turn to fight for a 6 or 7 seed in the playoffs. It will still be interesting to see how they cope with roster depth and a sinking free agent budget come time for bye weeks, but fate may be arriving slightly earlier than expected, as the lone 5-0 team will be coming to the Waddle house in week 6, making, for what should be a very high scoring affair.
8. Foster the Waiver Wire (2-3)
Owner – Chinmay Kulkarni
Last Week – #8
If there were ever moral victories in fantasy football, this week’s showing would be one of them. Scoring 125 points with a bagel from a certain Giants WR which, that team might as well be turning into a refugee camp, is not a terrible feat. This team is still trending in the upwards direction from where they were 2ish weeks ago, when Josh Jacobs’ foot got manhandled a blade of grass resulting in consecutive sub-70 point scoring. Still, this team has no tie-breaker over any teams, but expect them to be in the hunt for some of the final spots in the playoffs throughout the season.
9. Score a TD Boston (3-2)
Owner – Nikhil Ramanan
Last Week – #4
We get it, this team has been on the upswing for the past few weeks. After a dismal week 1 and 3-straight wins with barely above 100+ point performances, this team has simply not had the big play performance this season. Ramanan is trending in the wrong direction with the worst score of the week. This team stands with a 3-2 record and nearly has the same number of points as Chinmay’s 2-3 team that scored 60 points 2-straight weeks. Though it may be too early to put the F-word on this team, there’s a solid chance Ramanan may not even be able to field a team with numerous injuries across the board, and a QB who’s coach got fired. It doesn’t help that Ramanan plays Ayush this week, who scored 150+ points this week. It’s looking like tough sledding in the trenches for the next few weeks.
Award – Deep Throat of the Week
10. Brady 4Ever (1-4)
Owner – Parth Patel, Amit Dommeti
Last Week – #9
It was about time this team lived up to the team’s namesake. Week 5 should be classified as a dirty win for this team. Without a balanced lineup, several single digit showings from players, I’m starting to lose faith in the depth of this team especially when it comes to consistency. The Raiders are going to do their classic Raiders thing and fall apart in October, the Detroit Lions made a grown man cry, and the Cardinals had a struggle win over a rookie QB that looked like he didn’t know how to play football about a week ago. This team is built upon a house of cards that Brady built, and I temper my expectations of this team moving forward.
11. Cook out (1-4)
Owner – Keshav Ravi
Last Week – #12
The Cook Out finally passes its Sand-itation check with the first win of the season, and a convincing one at that, as Matt really fumbled the bag in week 5. The best scoring performance of the season from Keshav was spurred on when An-Tony Soprano caused the opponent to Brown out. Alex ‘Phil’ Collins and the Tampa Bay D/ST proved that Something was In the Air at Raymond James Field, as the Bucs defense had 1 interception, and 1 fumble recovery as the extremely injured Dolphins were illegally Hunted in international DeVon-ters. Keshav looks to add his second win to Arpan’s struggling team.
12. Odellta Airlines (0-5)
Owner – Vikas Molleti
Last Week – #11
I’ve paid far too much money for the yearly movie that stars Vikas Motor-mouth Molleti’s team scoring big points, having a terrible record, and surviving the consolation bracket. The best WR group in the league, a good QB and good RB1 have done this man absolutely dirty and I’ve lost hope that luck can be turned around. This begs a question, is it better to be bad, or be pinned with the infamous F-word? Honestly, I think the former is better – at least then you can throw the kitchen sink at your ESPN fantasy app and prey to the Viking gods that Kirk Cousins doesn’t forget that he has an all-pro WR in Adam Thielen. Vikas has yet another week to turn it around against Parth and Amit in week 6.
Award – Nikhil Ramesh D/ST of the Week
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